Robbin Bruce: Driving on top of a train, I don’t think so

  • Friday, January 17, 2014

I got to noticing something the other day while I was watching TV. There at the bottom of the commercial was a warning label, “This is a fantasy.” Well duh! I knew that. There you have a car jumping on the top of a speeding train, then after riding on top of it for a few miles, they drive it off. While it looks like it’s running 60 mph. And the whole time the commercial is on, there they are flashing warnings, don’t try this at home, this is a fantasy, cars won’t jump on trains. Now I know I’ve done a few crazy things in my life in my younger days, but jumping a speeding car on top of a train going even faster, well it never crossed my mind.

Well at least for not more than a minute or two. I know the brains of teenagers sometimes aren’t quite what they need to be. But seeing how when we grew up, if we had a set of wheels we had to pay for them out of our own pocket, the chance of totaling our car, on a dare, made us think a little harder about what we were going to get our selves into.

Although I did hear one time about two guys who were arguing about which pulled harder, a 4-wheel drive Chevy or a Ford. It’s been a long time ago, but it seems they backed up tailgate to tailgate with a logging chain. That was just the beginning of their problems. Well one of them had a towing bumper, and the other guy didn’t have one, so they just wrapped the chain around his back axle. See where I’m going with this? Well, from what I heard they were supposed to ease off, to let the chain tighten up, but one of them got excited. So he kicked it, then the other guy figures he better too. The next thing you knew you had one guy pulling an axle and a pair of tires down the road, and the other one, well, the bed of his truck sitting on the ground. From what I remember both of these were new trucks, still under warranty, which I bet took some explaining when they got them back to the shop.

Then there was the time over in Georgetown two guys got to arguing about who had the best car, there might have been a little alcohol involved, and they came up with a plan. And you know as well as I do, when you mix alcohol and planning ... this ain’t gonna be good. So here’s the plan, who ever can drive out in the marsh the furthest without sinking, he’s the winner. One was a Chevy; the other was a Volkswagen Beetle. Well to make a long story short, the way I heard it, it took two wreckers to pull him out, but the VW Beetle won. Though I kinda doubt they would have used this little fiasco for their TV advertising, but it sure is a lot safer than jumping a car on a moving train.

But then again, you’ve got to admit, each generation does get a little bolder. Maybe it’s because of all the stories we tell our kids of what we did when we were younger. And now they want to outdo us. I know the first time Boog saw Jessie’s husband Brook’s truck, a big ole Ford, jacked up, big tires, and every gizmo you can put on a truck, the wheels started spinning. He owns Carolina Custom Truck Accessories in Florence, and I pick at him because every time he rides down the road he’s advertising. Well the first thing Boog said was, “I gotta see if that truck’ll float!” Brook thought it was funny, I told him he better hide his keys. On a cold December night wading out to a floating truck with a wrecker cable, this ain’t gonna be good.

But now we got a new generation coming around, they are just not here yet. That’s right folks, a new generation, because I found out over Christmas, I’M GONNA BE A GRANDDADDY! And just as soon as my grandchild gets old enough to see over the steering wheel, you know what I’m going to do, go get your Daddy’s keys:

And get your Uncle Boog, we gonna see if Daddy’s truck WILL float!!

Robbin Bruce may be reached by e-mail at robbinbruce@yahoo.com.

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