Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Well, I am officially cooler this week than I was last week. And letís be honest, itís pretty hard to get cooler.
But, in honor of my birthday and the completion of my book I got my very first tattoo. Thatís right, this mother of four, somewhere in her 30s with a body one-quarter covered in stretch marks, got a tattoo. I am a rock star.
However, being me, it was not a simple affair. I called to make an appointment at 10 a.m. Because, what place of business is not open at 10 a.m? No one answered. No biggie. I tried again at 11, no answer. So, where was everyone? I am trying to make an appointment during prime time mom hours. This is the time that is after the kids leave, the madness and chaos of the morning has been cleaned. This is mom business time.
I tell my sister that I have called twice and no one has answered. She laughs. Apparently, I missed the class that told everyone what time really cool people went to work, and everybody knows that itís one oíclock. Haha, go ahead and laugh.
By one, I have vacuumed, mopped, done laundry, run errands, wrote for a bit, prepped dinner, packed the next dayís lunches and gotten school clothes ready for the next day. Maybe I am not as cool as I thought? Whatever...
Thankfully, I get through after they open. The guy that answered the phone offers me two different times ó one or six. Well, one is almost time for carpool and six is dinner and homework time. I mean really, why donít tattoo shops have mommy-friendly hours?
So, I pick one oíclock. Because, truthfully I was a bit of a chicken to be there at six. I can feel my coolness leaving as I type that...
The guy who did my tattoo was super nice. I had already sent him an e-mail of what I wanted, and I was getting pretty excited. But, because girls can never go anywhere alone, not to the bathroom and surely not to the tattoo shop, I dragged along my friend Pam. Girls like to travel in packs of two or more.
Once I got there he showed me what he had come up with from what I sent. It was lovely, and perfect. He was very kind and helpful ( I hope that doesnít take away any of his coolness). He carefully lined it all up and got started. I know that everyone says itís really painful, but it was really quick and painless. Unlike childbirth.
When I got home the kids all wanted to see it, of course. Denver looked at the book on my back with four hearts and said ďMommy, I know which heart is mine.Ē Only a cool rock star momís kid would say that.
But really, they need some mommy-friendly hours. Itís hard to be cool when youíre on a time limit.
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