Tuesday, December 31, 2013
When Eric is trying to prove a point, he will usually start by saying “Most people.”
He has been saying this for years.
He has said “Most women are not as lucky as you.”
Or, “Most husbands are not as helpful as I am.”
I have heard this “Most” thing for so long that I have started demanding to meet this “most” person.
When Eric says this my response is where is this “most” person?
Or, where was I when you were asking “most people?”
I know for a fact he is way too busy to go around asking most people.
So, I have my doubt about the existence of most people.
The kids have started doing this, except they say “everyone else.”
Everyone else has one. Everyone else gets to. Why can't I, when everyone else is?
Everyone else? Who is that? The kids are rarely away from Eric and I, except at school.
And I don't know a single parent who would name their kid “Everyone else.”
The problem with “Most people” and “Everyone else”, is that I am powerless against them.
I don't know who they are or where they live.
My only defense is I am not most people or everyone else. But how long can that defense last?
I have begun asking Eric to Google his statistics to back up his statements but so far that has only had limited success.
And I really don't want the kids to Google anything. It's very hard to fight an unseen enemy.
But I am warning you, “Most people” and “Everyone else,” I am coming for you and you are going down!
Just as soon as I figure out where you are ...
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