A person cannot get anything done when they are having to cough like a twisted pretzel

  • Monday, December 2, 2013

Well, I got what all moms dread. I got sick. Really sick.

What started out as a really bad cold, quickly became bronchitis. On Friday I sat in the exact same spot for six hours. As soon as the kids left for school I sat, and continued to sit.

All that sitting made me very proud of myself. Normally, I would push through and continue my normal household chores. But this was the first time in a long while that I decided I was going to treat myself like I was sick. Baby myself a bit. It did help that I managed to get sick on a weekend when my husband was home.

Yíall, I was so sick that I didnít even care that the house was a mess. I sat in my bed all feverish, sniffly and hacky, not caring if there was a mess. My kids ate 36 snack size bags of Pirate Booty in 36 hours. I did not care.

This was an illness not to be messed with. And you know what? I whined. Yep, I was a whiner. Complete with whiney Facebook statuses. I tried every home remedy and over the counter cure. The whiney was justified, since every time I coughed there was a double threat of germs and lack of bladder control. Four kids will do that to a bladder.

I even napped. My body was so confused about what was happening that when I took a nap it felt like three hours, but was really only 30 minutes. Still, I am proud of that nap. My fever was so high at one point I was convinced it was making me smarter. Like it was pre-heating my brain, like you pre-heat an oven. The fever was warming up for the good ideas to flow. Although I remember thinking I was a genius during that fever, I cannot remember a single good idea.

Once the fever left, the cough hung on for dear life. I coughed so hard that I pulled my ovary. That may or may not be medically possible but it sure felt like it. Then, every time I coughed it was a crazy production of leg crossing (bladder support) and ovary holding just to cough myself to death. I did that at least 100 times a day. A person cannot get anything done when they are having to cough like a twisted pretzel.

And even though I still have the sniffles and a cough several days later, I am proud of myself. I was sick and I gave myself permission to be sick and stay down. Nothing terrible happened. The house did not fall down and the dust bunnies did not take over. Things that needed to get done, waited. As they always will. My kids did not suffer because their mom was down for a while. The only thing thatís now worse is my ovary, but I am sure I donít need it.

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