Wednesday, November 27, 2013
Lately I have noticed a pattern with the kids.
I am not even finished with a sentence, and they are protesting whatever it is they think I am about to say.
I was helping Denver with his homework and was in the middle of reading the directions, when he literally interrupted me by crying and yelling.
He said he didn't understand what he was supposed to do.
Well, of course he had no idea what he was supposed to do.
I wasn't even finished with the directions.
And truthfully, I didn't know what he was supposed to do either. That's why we needed the directions. But instead of listening, he was laying on the ground, writhing around, complaining about how hard it was.
I may have thought about sitting on him until he would listen. I didn't though.
This is happening so frequently in our home that I have had to make a rule about it.
It's my “You may not freak out until after I am done giving you directions,” rule.
Even with chores this happens. A complaining wiggle starts happening while I am talking. It starts at the bottom and overtakes their bodies.
It is very annoying. What would happen if adults did that when their bosses asked them to do something? What if we all did the complaining wiggle? Maybe it's the kid version of a non-verbal protest. For all I know, maybe it's the international sign for “I don't wanna.”
Often, the wiggle is followed by lying on the floor. They suddenly get jello bones and cannot continue to stand. Maybe if this was all done in silence it wouldn't be so bad, but good grief it's done so loudly that I know all of our neighbors hear them. As a mom I am not a yeller, but when they do that it makes me want to yell. I mean, I have already done all my homework, years ago. So why do I have to sit here and be yelled at by my own kid about theirs?
Technically, I am supposed to want to help them. It is, after all, so they can grow up and be brilliant adults. But right now they thought of doing homework with the kids makes me want to do the “I don't wanna” wiggle. I wonder if I did that, would they see how silly they looked and stop? Hmmm, maybe it's worth a shot.
Although knowing me, I'd probably hit my head on the way down and end up needing stitches. Then I would have to explain to the doctors at the E.R what exactly I was doing. Which would probably lead to a padded cell. But, it might be worth the risk.